Pretty sure my dad just walked in on me jerking off watching guys on webcam. Remember how I used to say "most awkward day of my life?" I'm retiring that phrase.
She needs to learn what's it like to have sex with someone and regret it the next day.
It happened again. Now theres even more baby powder and its all over the place, I'm not cleaning that house.
My right arm is handcuffed to my leg... Please help.
I don't think my prof knows we've noticed her No Bra Fridays.
ugh... I can't wait for campus to get back. Then everyone will have other things to try to have sex with besides me.
Basically as long as the fan is pointed at my vagina i can cool off enough to sleep.
lol i'm looking through my photos and there's this giant section of just dudes wearing murses
Tell me again your tentative move date. There are 5 Russians in my apartment on ecstasy and they are having a rave in my living room. I can't. I need to move stat
Well I woke up at my house so that's a plus. But I'm pretty sure I peed on my sofa because I woke up in the pee position.
well i don't NEED my liver but it's nice to have one when you're trying to have a good time
Well she made a 15 year old cry, the grandmother did an ice luge and I woke up to the sound of sex moans
I almost wanna stick a tampon in and sneeze bent over to see if it actually shoots out
Lol woke up with mangoes in bed with me
Well obviously we have a ghost in the house who’s taking showers in your bathroom and doing our cocaine.
Randomize
