I might come over and watch a movie but I can't spend the night. my parents would wonder where i was
you're 26.
the fair has chocolate covered bacon...impossible is nothing.
the cops didnt even say happy birthday to me :(
if i remember New Year's Eve then there is something seriously wrong.
My entire floor is waiting for the couple to come out of the shower. She's a screamer. We've blockaded them
Nothing like studying in the College of Communication to make you realize how smart you are.
My natural self cock block skills kicked in last night. I could've got on like 2 chicks but i ended up throwing up all over my van instead.
My god. We'll be gay porn millionaires.
you say it like running around in your thong wasted is a bad thing
Ask him about a girl named Meg then give a disappointed and disapproving face.
Im just saying it can't be that bad if he drove himself to the er. We'll head that way when we finish playing scattergories
He said he was gonna go pull a lochte and the next thing we know he's outside ass naked peeing in the neighbors kiddie pool.
Much like Dre, I was forgotten about.
He came over in a blaze orange vest with a case of beer and a shotgun yelling about "Dove Season" then passed out in the lawn. There he lies
Why were you naked on your bathroom floor?
It was a "get entirely naked to take a shit" kind of blackout I think.
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