but it happened after you broke up with me and before we made up.
my roommate just said, "don't look at it, just put it iin your mouth"
I'm so high I used the top vent on my dashboard to heat up a cheeseburger
Waking and baking has revolutionized how i brush my teeth. Seriously up to like 25 min everry morn. Highly recommend
I fell asleep to him stroking my ass calling it his precious.
And they were awkwardly all over each other in a Christian way.
Ohmygod. I don't know if I can explain how great it'll be. I hope you don't mind Subaru sex
its 2pm. u awake yet?
ill text u back later. still peeling fingernail polish off my face.
Yeah when I texted her last night the only response I got was "stoned eating cobbler."
Guess who just made out with Sloth from The Goonies!
I am the fucking FIFTH wheel. How do you think it's going?
PICK ME UP NOW I THINK THIS MOTEL IS A CRIME SCENE. also congrats on your engagement i saw the post on my phone while i was climbing out the window
Gonna try and have sex in the empire state bldg, will tell you how it goes
Normal people find beers in their gym bag, right?
Why in the hell is there a guy dressed up as a horse passed out in our kitchen.
happy birthday!
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