Apparently you make a good broom.
I'm so glad you managed to take a picture of your foreskin before you broke my camera.
does he have a tent? the camping kind not the boner kind.
Sign #1 this conference will suck: Ice breaker question, how many proud virgins do we have in the room, overwhelming response. Looks like I'm not getting laid this weekend.
Drunk in some girls audi what the fuck is happenin i love sb
it's ELEVEN
thirty
Please tell me you are a size medium in men's clown onesies and that you forgot them here last night.....
there was a trail of blood coming out of one of the bathroom stalls. thought of you
She won't let me open the car door while we are on the highway so I can throw up outside. She deserves to have her car thrown up in.
This is your morning news. Today at 5 pm I will be going out of town until the 29th. If you would like some great sex before I leave, please contact me. The available packages are: a house call, an outdoor excursion, or a delivery style in-car quickie. available only while supplies last.
It was more like a tour de entire bottle of wine in 14 minutes
I mean, I Just Had Sex in 4 on her top 25 most played list. That's got to give you some indication
I WOULD NEVER LIE ABOUT SOMETHING AS SERIOUS AS SABADO GIGANTE BEING CANCELED
There is a video of you making out with him, flipping off the camera, and holding the plastic flamigo that you had just stolen out of a yard
She woke up next me in bed and told me to stop driving so fast.
i need to get drunk because i'm an angry sober
Randomize
