so all night Ive been that girl with her tits out @ the bar. I mean I dropped jaws, yo. But in a classy way.
We can make salsa ya know, maybe even some hot sauce. That doesn't mean we're married.
you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
I swear after i took it all i did was scream for four hours
Oh God! I'm naked from the waist down playing records. Too drunk. I don't even know what to do.
Balls out but with a shirt on. Eating ravioli. I don't know how to deal with this.
THE CONDOM ONLY COVERS HALF OF HIS DICK I AM IN THE BATHROOM PANICKING
My bed smells like stale sex...I want it to smell like fresh sex, I miss you.
I'm not sure if it was the 11 shots or your naturally vibrant personality but I recall you being quite noisy that evening
Well, if you're getting/have gotten your dick sucked, you're welcome. If not, I tried. Step up your game, pussy. I pulled a MacGuyver and got mine. No excuses bro.
Well I have rug burns in both armpits, somehow. So yes you should have been here
6 pack came off in the shower. Sharpie is not forever.
I'm just mad because I can't play gta5 all day tomorrow cuz I'll be in court testifying against a craigslist prostitute...
It's 3 am and I'm buying cat food and batteries for my vibrator. Good thing I shaved my legs for this.
As you passed out you started to cry and say "Mufasa" over and over again making everyone else cry.
The best part of Easter was watching all his colorblind cousins try to find the eggs.
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