i hate sounding clingy, but i just wanted to verify i wasn't an asshole in your mind
She just texted me saying, "I wish you were a better person so I could fuck you without regrets"
Dude!! Mom just asked me why you have 'boobies' hahaha
I hate my life
life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
Chicago was legit, ate some badass pizza and gave a cig to a crackhead..its all i thought it would be
So we went to home depot to buy supplies to build a beer bong but ended up buying an office water cooler that were going to put vodka in
It was good I woke up with my mattress on top of me. I walked around naked the whole night as people wished my Happy Birthday.
I feel like I've been drunk all of June. And I am in NO WAY ashamed about it.
Also, you tried to make me learn all of the presidents, in order, with a picture book as an aid. At 4 am. What the fuck?
If you like her enough, bring her with. If not, eloquently cunt punt that bitch through the field goals of life.
It's that thing where you don't have any food so you just drink beer to get your needed calories for the day.
Although a guy bought me a shot of fireball last wknd and I told him he wouldn't even get half a handjob for that and walked away so don't tell me I don't have standards
well he never texted me back and the pizza I took my rage out didn't deserve such malice
You squatted and peed on the living room floor while maintaining eye contact with Sebastian
I remember waking up on the bathroom floor and seeing my teeth behind the toilet
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