Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
is it really weird I just got "suckable tits" in my honesty box and I'm flattered??
White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
I don't want to have to wonder if I'm draining my pasta in the same side of the sink you pissed in
I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.
I just found a video on my phone from last night of you yelling, "you can't fuck me!" at least 20 times
We are gunna have the best winter break smoking weed and eating ham
You need Xanax blowdarts
I don't care how hungry or impatient you are. the highest setting on the microwave is 100% and you better not take it appart to add power. This is not the Enterprise.
Can I just have sex with him and then never talk to him? I need him to be the Mr. Miyagi of my sex life.
I hoped the great care he put into rolling a blunt would translate to my vagina.
He called yelling about whhhhhhiskey and enchiladas I heard sirens in the background last time I talked to him b
Sexting and pancakes... It's going to be hard to top that
Okay, this next statement may sound like a red flag but I'm tellin you, shotgunning those two beers really helped me love my child more effectively. Honest.
well, i found him passed out on a picnic table two miles away with a lit cig in his hand...he had a rough night
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