But I don't consider them one night stands. They're auditions.
Proposition. Sex. No words, no talking about it later. I just want you tonight.
nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
dont touch anything in my room. If its phallus shaped, i can almost guarantee its been in my vagina.
Just got a call from someone claiming to be my son . How do I initiate a conversation. Tell me about the last eighteen years. And by the way who is your mom again?
After he told me that it's up to him to carry on his family name, I almost felt bad for not letting him cum inside me.
They're taking me to ER. Mistasnkingly. Come get me.
Yay for living on the edge. I'm trying this new thing where I stop mom-arming people and promote bad decisions. It's working quite well.
I'm not sure if I should be proud of you for having morals or disappointed in you for letting your sex life get this sad.
Currently hot boxing a fort I made on our snow day... This is legendary
Everytime I try to keep track of the amount of people I slept with I always forget about that guy I met on the dc metro, where I woke up to him organizing his Special K and Molly and I was covered in sleeping cats.
Tip of the day: Don't Amazon vibrators when your WHOLE FAMILY uses your prime account. There's dildo after dildo showing up in my "Related to Items You've Viewed" category on the home page.
Nah I think he's a bit weirded out I worked out where he lives from a Facebook photo
In any case. I fucked a married couple recently. Know what a straight person would've done there? Been super weirded out by 1/3 of the genitals there, that's what.
I'm in the fetal position trying to figure out a way to get someone to deliver me pancakes.
Randomize
