I think I just puked all over my comforter and my roomdmate won't wakt up to washc it for me
Fuck, now I'm not only the other woman, but the pregnant one
I watched her choke out a bouncer with the broken strap from her purse, I think shes the one.
Yes, she did suck your dick in the bathroom to wake you up.
I was so proud to be driving sober that I wanted to get pulled over so I could tell the officer I hadn't been drinking.
my life is about to be the like the hunger games except with penises. and im going to win.
Do you ever feel like your dog agrees with you? Like REALLY really agrees.
I think I'm done drinking. How did we end up partying at a frat house with my mom...
It happened to me once. But i washed off in a duck pond and walked home naked.
So, just saw a lady hysterically sobbing in a Walmart at 3 AM. Someone's not having a happy mother's day.
…wtf were in those pills mom gave me
I wore Yonce braids out last night and made out with a man and a woman #bowdown is right
I know you're having some issues right now but can we focus on the gangbang?
As a side note, can you ask the maintenance staff not to drag their balls on our stairwell handrails. Please.
Idk I just think that seeing that man's Twitter always resulting in me looking for the whiskey is a bad sign
Randomize
