Wow my backseat really seemed a lot bigger when we were 16
so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
see if i had a dick i'd definitely smack people in the face with it
He tricked me into going on a double date with him, I don't like that he's not using me for just sex anymore
Haga you didnt jbsii whee wu an therer
Party on wayne
I just realized the only way to play Edward forty-hands is commando in a skirt. This intelligence kick is really doing me justice.
He literally chugged a bottle of wine in under 2 minutes. Stood up, said "fuck what ya heard" and stabbed the bottle into their drywall.
i told the cop we knew everyone at the party, it was 250 of our closest friends and she's like funny nobody on the balcony knew whose house this was
Thats why they were on the balcony!
I have a LOT of reasons to worry about radical feminists taking my lady balls, frankly. A lot.
We fucked so hard and loud that the everyone at the party downstairs starting chanting his name. Oh I we broke a lamp.
Seriously, though. As long as it's attached to you and is not a vagina, I will not be disappointed.
The tequila monkeys have a drum solo in my skull right now. I can't imagine Emily feels better.
We went from him going down on me to swapping baby pictures of our moms.
Had sex on the beach last night with a drug dealer. win-win-win situation
look, bitch. one day when everyone i care about deserts me for my severe moral depravity, you're going to be the only one i have.
i can't wait.
Randomize