yay, now i'm not the only homewrecker.
yeah but i stopped sleeping with him after i found out he was married.
the fair has chocolate covered bacon...impossible is nothing.
So, apparently I made everyone omelets last night. Even when I'm drunk, I'm still a trophy wife.
It was going well until he told me about the 7k he made in college to be in a gay porn
So I've gone into the break room to heat up a styrofoam cup 8 times over the course of 4 hours.. that desperate to see him. Now I have a broken heart AND cancer.
I know it was you that I fucked last night... I can smell my disappointment all over the sheets
I've never known a guy to fuck more random girls in the ass then Dom. His rectal kill ratio is at like 85%
He's like the Derek Jeter of Anal
Is selling savings bonds for acid money something a normal person does?
But now I'm just thinking when he said he "worked for the airline" he actually meant drug smuggling.
"Yeah because the first thing I think of when I hear the word college is tear gas."
I got propositioned to get involved with an engaged couple. I told them I didn't think my married couple would like me to see other couples...
I don't think I'm gonna survive today. I don't remember how to walk. I must crawl 6 blocks to my bed.
What are we just gonna be those girls that get fucked in your parents basement and not get taken to dinner? I don't wanna be those girls.
What happened last night dude?
YOU SHIT ON MY FUCKING COFFE TABLE THATS WHAT FUCKING HAPPENED!!!
So I've already made 5 bad decisions today, wyd?
Randomize
