Did you know that when you swallow it's like 60 calories!?
That's okay, it's all protein anyway.
He probably put up nude pics. He seems like that kind of guy.
Before I left in the morning I deleted her purity ring app off her iPod, I figured it would save her the shame
I'm not saying he has herpes, I'm just saying he slept with my friend that has herpes.
I was told u were the one who could explain to me why i woke up in the running shower, still in my dress and heels
She's all pretty and bubbly and nice and I'm sitting here stoned looking like Lucifer.
I didn't want to walk to anymore parties because I found a cat. It was magical.
Doesn't matter how many times we tell him the kid's a freshman, he keeps repeating "cupcake boy shall be mine" and honestly you need to intervene
See I would make a great girlfriend. My surprises are sex and burritos. What else do guys want
Well at least ssomeone is or the state is tafing over ir in twligiob
You kept ripping all your clothes off and saying, "Let me be free!"
Someone explain to me why I woke up to find a stolen shopping cart in my room...
He doesn't have much of a personality but he makes up for it with his sexual prowess
keeper.
Yeah well I fucked my ex on a sink last night soooo booty calls for us all
If I wanna spend the whole night tied up and getting railed I'm allowed to do so
Randomize