I don't know. The next thing I remember we were in the walmart parking lot making out.
can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
I knew as soon as I saw that pole that I was going to wake up the next morning with bruises.
If you're not washing nut sweat off of your forehead this morning I'm disappointed in you
I got arrested for "public intoxication". Fuckers threw me out of the bar into public... i mean shit they have thirsty Thursdays. And I get thrown out for self serve Sundays plus a citation.
We are cuddling. She is so cute when she is too high to be a loud bitch.
Do not deep throat a rocket pop, it WILL go into your lungs, and you may die.
Having to explain to my dad why there are chicken wings to the pool filter, new low.
I'm just opting for alcohol abuse, ramen and cuddling with my dog for now.
There's a website where you can order a pile of horse shit to be dropped on a persons doorstep. So that's another option.
You know your acid trip is going well when the orange you're eating gives you a life lesson
It's a sad day when you're not really phased by the McChicken video only because you've seen weirder porn.
And with the bitter taste of failure in my mouth, i am off to pub to drown it in tequila and 19 year olds, so in the morning i can add pregnancy and stds to my list of problems.
Oh god, I forgot we had sex to Elton John
it was the most awkward makeout ever. it was record breaking really
...i feel like you have a lot of those.
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