I can only be a whore so many days outta the week.
Samesies
She goes outside, smokes 2 cigarettes, and insists on walking up the 7 flights of stairs so that her heart stays in shape. this woman is crazy.
Theres also beggin' strips and a dog bone in the corner...nooo signs of there being a dog though.
i seriously wanted to pee on her right then.
I hope the dean has a raincoat on because I'm prolly gonna throw up on him when I get my degree
It wasn't the stripper that gave you the hickey but I just figured out who did
How many layers of skin can you loose before it becomes bad?
Doing lines of coke with a $100 dollar bill off a 6in x 9in photo of your childhood self really tells you where you where you've gotten in life.
I'm not taking advise from someone who responded to the pickup line "I have a penis"
I'm going through a really dark time right now
I don't want to hear it man. I just jerked it to a pic of my ex wife in a bikini. Buck up
My new hobby is moving his stuff to random places in the house. Good luck making a smoothing at 6:30 in the morning, the blender top's in the dog food container
Walking actually physically hurts. We should do it again some time.
Of course the sales lady was judging you, you bought a pregnancy test, ky jelly, diet pills and a 6 pack of red bull. Even i'm judging you.
When the people downstairs start talking about drugs, I second guess buying my drugs from them. Then I remember they are cheap and convenient.
Hey, I'm sleeping in your car...lol just knock on the window in the morning
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