I asked him if he wanted to go to my place, he said i could go but he was gonna stay
the third sister isn't as attractive as the other two but I will do her anyway to finally pull off the fabled family hat trick.
Stop blaming waffle house for all your problems
I was passed out on the couch, she literally cut my boxers off with a 8" chef's knife and had her way with me.
I feel like vodka or no vodka, you'd still be trying to button your cat into your comforter
her moans were so awkward that i kept asking "what" when she'd say my name...
It was awesome explaining why I had a tiger with boxers in my bed, a little bit drunk, to a girl in a pre-sex moment
Underwear, t-shirt, bottle of Pinot Grigio and Golden Girls. I've hit a new level of homosexual.
dude this night sums up my single life. naked, crying, and covered in honey. i need to get laid.
Though I don't usually want to turn down ladies who want to liquify my clothing with their eyes, I made an exception.
Well, I was asked to leave the Waffle House for "being to physical" so I think that option is off the table
I feel a little uneasy about having my grandma sleep in my bed that I've banged chicks in not too long ago... Fuckin blizzards
I think our maternal nature is best focused on grown ass men and cats.
It was a strange night. I made out with his college roommate and said "do you care?" beforehand.
He smells like sex and magic. I’m already naming our children
Maybe you should talk to him first
Randomize