i want to be waterboarded, just to see what all the fuss is about
I made out with four boys last night, AND EXCUSE ME WHILE I COUNT HOW MANY GIRLS.
We stopped her at 12
12 shots? Or 12 midnight?
Which answer would freak you out less
I forget the details, but I'm told that I drunkenly stalked him around floor yelling obscure Jewish laws at him
just found a carrot inside of a baby sock. living with toddlers is like living with tiny hammered people.
we need to drink more beer. the fridge wont close.
... They left for 10 minutes and came back with a lobster he's in the toilet downstairs
lets just use each other and get past this awkward stage. forget my name.
The guy I met last night said we had a real connection and gave me his AA coin because he met me during his relapse
When you passed out on the kitchen counter she brushed and flossed your teeth, then carried/dragged you to bed. Why aren't you married?
Good. We don't answer calls at dick thirty.
You need a sexual gate keeper
I've just had my first cup of coffee in a month and I moaned at the first drink and honestly I think this is the most sexual expreiance in 6 months
Calm down I'm not kidnapping the bartender
If I call him daddy should I get him a father's day card? Serious question
Randomize
