I wish I could teleport
He seemed more like the type to get donkey punched by a she-male hooker to me
I swear if she hugs me I'm going to bleach my body
haha my mom just sent us out to go to all of the hair cutting places to ask for hair because deer ate all our zuchini.. and we have to pee in a bucket all day cause deer hate urine. please tell me we are normal?
i cant lie to you.
filled out health questionnaire for lower premiums a little bit too honestly. Literally got assigned a life coach.
You should come over. I am making a celebratory I got laid by a huge penis cake.
repeat this after me. period at the beach is better than baby at the beach. breathe. and: period at the beach is better than baby at the beach.
She got a digital picture frame for her birthday. FINALLY - a place for me to sneak all those penis shots I've taken with my iPhone.
It's official. 2011 is the year of sport fucking
Occasionally I curse my inner 15 year old when I'm fulfilling their dreams as a slut, but I roll with it.
Are you okay?
I went home with a 38 year old guy in a kilt, do I look okay!
I mean obviously I like your dick... Jury is still out on you but your dick is good
girl pulled up to the stop sign, got out, threw up all over my hood said happy thanksgiving then drove off
KY in my mouth and throat does not a party make.
Dude why is my bed and bedding wrapped in bubble wrap?
Cuz u wanted to insure u had a safe sleep
Randomize
