Of course we end up in a gay bar... And I have to tell you there are some hot dudes here, should I pass around your Facebook?
I couldnt find her vag and just started laughing uncontrollably. She was not pleased. Neither was i.
Its like a 4.5 hour drive but there's drinking involved so I'm destined to go
Mattress luging...It's a long story.
We were squawking at each other for over an hour like chickens. Literally. Never touching the stuff again and never again showing my face at that Denny's.
My dick is covered in produce stickers. I suspect you
Found my shoes and purse. They're all strapped together in my neighbor's tree. Need to borrow your ladder. Thanks in advance
And I was aware of my actions - that is not a penis I will say no to until I have a ring on my finger
I'm sorry I did drugs then got really loud and bitchy at your party and judged your choice in one night stands.
only thing in my fruit bowl is 4 champagne corks and a jenga piece . Tuesday.
2 hours later, she made her cat watch the waterfall scene from Homeward Bound to teach her how good she has it here.
I'm sure the lady doing my pedicure could smell the sex on me.
Alcohol and IMDB don't always mix with 100% accuracy
You were on the train yelling, "THIS TRAIN NEEDS TO GO FASTER SO I CAN GO HAVE SEX WITH MY BOYFRIEND!!!"
Is there a reason drunk me put drunk you's phone in the freezer?
Randomize