I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
walked right past julianne moore (on her walk of shame this morning) god i love new york. :)
I seriously just caught my 15 year old little sister with a positive pregnancy test coming out of the bathroom. Honest to God.
I have a coat hanger and a baseball bat. Her choice.
Don't be a smartass. I'm trying to fuck a guy who's sober. It's more difficult than you think.
West Wing DVD drinking game: drink whenever they waqlk around a lot. I LOVE POLITICS SO MUCH
He was probably pissed, but i couldn't tell for sure. How pissed can someone really look while holding a fishbowl mimosa?
They gave me a glowstick necklace to wear so they could locate me if I wandered off into the woods
Did you know there's no emoticon to really tell you that I just consumed a magic brownie?
oh yeah, there may or may not be a large boa loose in the house when you get home.
I couldn't do it. You can't break up after that many orgasms. It's physically impossible.
Apparently "I licked it so now it's mine" doesn't apply to people
Masturbating during the Olympics and cumming during the national anthem really is everything it's cracked up to be. Just thought you should know.
Is this like a preordered booty call?
Puke-y regrets or just things-seem-far-away regrets?
Did I tell you he put a lobster carcass on his dick?
Randomize
