Dude if I didn't piss myself last night I dont think I would have woke up in time for work.
he showed me his boner with his cell phone light during the movie.
I cant even remember his name or what he looked like. all I remember is what the tattoo on his forearm looked like.
well, he kindof looked like a walmart greeter. I tried to stop you
He was sitting on the bathroom floor, swirling his finger in the toilet singing the Laguna Beach theme song. I don't know whether to laugh or help him.
I just smoked my last bit of kief with a grill lighter. This is what crackheads must feel like.
So I feel bad, Ross is asking questions, I think they need to know it's a Spanish lesbian bar
I need to find a more grown up way of dealin with a hangover at the office than pringles and mountain dew at 8:30 am...
I'm silent, like a masturbating ninja.
Doing Jager Bombs on a Sunday morning is justified...How else is my team going to win?
You can't tell me you've honestly NEVER considered smoking a Froot Loop
And the sky opened up and god said.... "WET T-SHIRT CONTEST!!!!"
you know it's been too long when the heat of a pizza box on your lap turns you on.
Let's FaceTime each other while we shotgun beers
Nice people suck dick too. I'm proof.
I got home and he was wearing a suit. He said he reason was because it was shirt and tie Saturday and that he won't change until midnight. He then proceeded to answer the door in a British accent.
Randomize
