I don't think cute and don't forget to get tested belong in the same text
You pointed at his crotch then made a thrusting motion. I think it's safe to say every guy at my college loves you.
Why does he only make me orgasm when I'm about to break up with him?
In the library. Still drunk. Shoes missnig. Term paper due in fiften minutes. Iff I puke u think theyll throw me out?
Don't do anything you wouldn't want to explain to paramedics
But that's half the fun of it
I definitely did a line of something I don't know with a Pagan biker. I make good decisions.
Why is there broken glass in my purse?
You stole a snow globe. From your VP. Soooo...maybe don't put all your hopes on that promotion you were expecting
I'd like to believe that in some alternate universe we are living this wonderful lesbian life together..
You were wearing a cookie monster onesie and telling everyone you were actually the sausage monster..
On the bright side I still got laid
This couch is so comfortable I can tell if it's like a waterbed or I pissed myself
Ah. Hot spring. Infinitely less skeevy than a hot tub. These North Carolinian dudes are all class.
Step 1 was make out with him. so now we just need to come up with step 2.
My parents are coming to visit the 28th. How bad is it that I put a reminder in my phone to "hide sex toys"?
It goes to show, Sane person, daddy doms, little girls, all of us may seem different but deep inside we all grow wisdom teeth
Not to be hella graphic on main but I just came so hard I think I saw a new color.
Randomize
