But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
FYI..good luck when you get back from work.. mom and dad know about the boy you brought home last night
haha good one..how did you even know?
we all know. he obviously didn't leave when you might have told him to.. he came down when we were eating because he coud smell mom's cooking. the dude ate with us and offered to say grace. so yeah, good luck.
so im watching realhousewives of jersey with my mom. she just said they werent really rich bc they were doing their own makeup.
i woke up to find out i shared my bed with a full, open can of natty light last night and didnt spill it. then i drank it for breakfast.
Its 11am everyones wasted wearing sombreros and eating fresh produce..cesar chavez would be very proud
I walked in and she was doing shots, betting the managers if any of the customers would notice, and screaming that nothing would ruin her Saturday night. Say what you want, I like working with my sister.
she said I was laying next to a garbage can in the subway doing key bumps and screaming "its my fucking birthday" repeatedly
You have a roommate and cry when you see my dick
I think my body is literally trying to get me to reproduce. "fuck someone! Anyone!" - my body
Your resume just got faxed, I also modified it a bit and sent it to strip clubs...expect weird phone calls...
Fucked a kid by the name of your hometown tonight... FOR THE WIN.. BF4L
You were carrying a 6 ft lamp that we stole on your back yelling "OHANA MEANS FAMILY AND FAMILY MEANS NOBODY GETS LEFT BEHIND"
I put purple lights under my bed and asked him if he wanted to fuck in a spaceship.
Is it appropriate to send an apology gift to his roommates for breaking the bathroom sink during crazy sex?
Showed up to pick her up in my boxers. Lets just say im 2 for 2 with this new idea
Randomize
