guess who just spent driver's ed figuring out how to draw a guy giving head
I'm gonna keep this simple. I threw up in your pillow case. Sorry.
It was like fucking a house. Down the chimney. That deep and empty.
Mom's drinking. Just asked her if she was good to walk back to the condo. She seemed unsure until she remembered she brought the GPS. We are 2 blocks from the condo.
Dear God. I kissed a man tonight who was born in 1936.
My afternoon will now be spent googling genital warts. I think my life is over.
I got mine. It's a truly beautiful penis. Plus he pulled his tongue muscle on my vagina.
It's only Tuesday and I just measured and checked to see if my 6'5 Friday booty call will fit in the back of my jeep comfortably.
Is everyone touching their nose at me a sign that I should stop snorting vicodin off my phone in the bathroom at school?
If you quit, you're not going to stick to our game plan of dead by 40. I will not be in the titty bar nursing home without you damning
Damnit.
Then he rubbed shampoo all over my arm and shouted, "Garnier FUCK THIS."
He said he could outsmoke me so I challenged him to a weed duel. I don't always very competitive but when I do...
In going to go underground and live with the mole people for a while.
If you don't believe in my fighting skills, I don't know if we can be together
I'm a lady who knows what she wants in life, and that's uncommitted dick.
Randomize
