she was pooping while we were on video chat. new level of love.
First night in the new apartment. There are 12 people here i don't know, Tequila, and a crying girl locked in our bathroom. I think the apartment christening is complete.
just saw way to many penises for it being 5 o'clock on a thursday
and now her best friend is massaging my table under the leg. this may not end well.
We proceeded to buy tattoos from the dollar store and interpretive dance to of monsters and men, it's safe to say he's my new fuck buddy
I just paid for weed by taking him to the store to buy cheese so he could make empanadas. Best. Drug deal. Ever.
So he got the TA job but i told him its not official until we have a quickie on his desk. He offered to break into his office. He doesnt start until this fall.
Say whatever you bloody well like; you don't know the true meaning of life until you have smoked to a Sade cd.
I made out with a guy so that I could get ahead in the bathroom line, totally acceptable
Lol woke up with mangoes in bed with me
I was eating pickles straight from a jar, contemplating doing something productive. What did I miss?
One sec I was having the time of my life, the next I was shitting water
First non virgin Sunday. Bursts into flames.
I remember that. We went to taco bell looking for pizza.
how is it I left wearing underwear then ended up with none? and why is it they are on you?
Randomize
