He left the bathroom door open so i would hear him masturbate in the shower to make me feel guilty for not putting out but it just turned me on cause i like guys masturbating. weird?
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
Max was wondering if he could trade you sex for the use of your jumper cables
The drugs are starting to wear off. Suddenly aware there's a girl with bald patches and 2 guys that don't have a full set of teeth between them.
you started introducing us as kentucky and gentlemen
seriously my hangover is so bad I feel like my eye lashes make blinking a workout
Just gave a gay guy pointers on how to make anal not hurt. Reevaluation of life choices: in progress.
Are you asking me on a date where we get shithoused and do some fingerpainting?
What's the most polite way to say "Congrats on losing weight, but no one is happy your boobs got smaller."
The last thing I remember was you puking all over the inside of my door and him yelling "PUKING RALLY!!!"
Of the three people getting wasted at this dance competition, im two of them
WHAT THE FUCK KIND OF NINTENDO FILLED GLORIOUS ENCHANTING FANTASY LAND ARE YOU IN?! DUDE DID YOU MOVE TO THE 90S?!?!?!
True I am eskimo brothers with every one of my room mates, but it was only two girls. And 9 outta 10 times I was first
He was a Cher impersonator. They are the draggest of queens
It was weird, it was like my heart got a boner. Is this being an adult?
Randomize
