what do you think about when you wanna get rid of a boner?
dying kittens.
She was so bad on top that i found myself watching a TV that wasn't even turned on
It was as awful as eating cow testicles on fear factor and not winning and realizing you ate balls for nothing.
it's just like freshman year of high school, with more drugs
My new years resolution is to be alive new years morning
I want to give my boyfriend great head for his birthday...can i practice on you?
What's the point of being healthy if people still don't want to fuck you?
at what point did putting a bag of doritos in the freezer seem like a really good idea?
apparently i was just sitting there with my shirt down holding my boobs saying "its ok. its all gonna be ok"
I just had a Brazilian done for this guy. He's getting first-date sex whether he wants it or not.
Call me old-fashioned, but I don't think the words, "Finger my ass" should find their way into casual conversation.
I told him I was very thankful for what his country has done to my vagina and walked away.
yo knit me an eyepatch. but also make it usable as a thong
Well it might’ve been because you asked to play What Makes You Beautiful at the club
just used my $120 dollar stats book for the first time to kill an ant... good thing i stole it
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