Was just hit on by a guy with 2 kids and one was named Rocky. I need to get out of Buena Park.
I love how all these freshman girls think that they can wear what they wore last summer... freshman 15 at its skankiest
I think I've hugged the toilet more times than I've hugged my own family members.
Its not christmas eve unless I give him head. I wont take no for an answer
I should have taken pre-gaming this lunch date more seriously.
I need to get skinnier so that I know when pregnancy scares are real...
Let's not refer to him as Dustin. That makes him seek like a real person, not just a dick I would like to experience.
No need to talk. Eventually, he'll either stop coming over, or decide that it's a relationship.
And if not?
...I keep getting free bourbon and great sex with no expectations. You really don't understand that there is no "down side," do you?
bro, your right, i shouldn't feel embarrassed about taking shots from a penis-shaped ice sculpture
Dude! I just figured out I can successfully hide a 4oz flask between my boobs without endangering my cleavage! College: conquered!
O was like, nah, fuck 50-50. My version of bi is that i'm 80% gay, 20% drug-addled decisions. Apparently he's straight on hallucinogens.
My desperation for dick was off put by his anime figure collection.
So I'm at early voting and the group of ladies behind me is talking about voting no on 2 and my gummy is kicking in, thank lawd
the man at taco bell in the drive thru window tried to sell me his mix tape
his single is called “stick some holes in it”
My prof handed me back my essay on Lesbians in literature, gave me an A and then we had sex in her office. Told you she was gay.
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