No. I broke it. Note to self, never take a shower with your phone in your pocket.
Preparing for thanksgiving at home now by chugging bourbon. Less than a month to train!
there is potential here for me to have a consistent access to someone's dick who isn't actually an asshole. i think i'm ready for a relationship.
Just started taking liver support pills. Welcome to Senior year.
The little girl I babysit saw pink plastic shot glasses in my car and asked what they were for and I told her they were princess teacups.
Apparently being drunk on a southwest flight and yelling "TURNUP" during take off is looked down upon in this state.
So I had sex in a bulldozer lastnight now that's definitely a first...
Dad stumbling and puking in the White Castle parking lot = Father's Day success
xanax give me strength to not ask where we stand with booty calls
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
I've decided to give up hard drugs for the rest of the year.
I feel like I put a fire out with my hand but idk if that was a dream or not
He was 6'5 and wearing a kilt, how could I not fuck him
I broke another vibrator the other day. Abstinence is not for me.
As soon as you told us you were an ostrich with a big penis, we began to wonder what you were on and if you wanted to share.
Randomize