That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
the guy in front of me just bought a pound of bacon, a bouquet, and a case of budlight, i want to see THAT makeup sex
I just learned you can mail a coconut. I'll be over in 3 days with the rum.
So, Southern Comfort will donate 25 cents for every bottle sold towards Gulf Coast Relief... Can we save the wetlands through my alcoholism?
Yeah, all the sudden I heard a loud "ding" and realized I had been passed out on the dorm elevator for about an hour....
I brought his matress to the living room we're laying on it listening to rick james drinking vodka
Lost my virginity in a banana suit. Glad I waited.
he may be homeless but his dick however is not... anymore.
Is "when in doubt date the guy with the bigger dick" a good philosophy?
"I'm looking more at his dick bulge." Never thought I'd hear those words come out of my boyfriend's mouth.
At least his std test came back clean, gotta look at the positives here
I'll meet you in hell with unlimited boxes of wine though
also, when i showed up he started talking to me and eventually asked me if the girls treated me well. i went on to talk about my sex life. he was talking about his secretaries.
Remember that gum I swallowed 3 days ago? I just threw it up.... whole.
you need to drop off my dinner before you go see him because i'm not gonna wait until you're finished fucking him to get my damn chinese food
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