you told everyone your name was brenda and you had the whole party chanting b-dawgg by the end of the night. successful.
Is licking assholes a new fad or something?
I wont touch it. I promise i wont touch it. JUST GET UNDER THE DAMN TABLE PLEASE.
i just heard a guy call his kid "Google" in a way that leads me to believe that's his name. this day couldn't get worse.
Ive been tazing him too get him immuned. He will be unstopable.
he puked in his toast at dennys. after snoopdogg high fived him. couldn't be prouder to be his bro in law.
The freshman sure do fuck up the whataburger line at 2am
well i just had my first "when i graduated college she was 12" morning
I have too much respect and admiration for my dick to put it into a situation where he could possibly be killed
You're the only person I know who would be upset about making out with a girl you like. You're like a drunken Charlie Brown.
Last night I was just holding this kitten up to my face for like ten minutes telling it that it couldn't be real
I feel like we have both made good decisions regarding our vaginas lately
But truly, sorry about your empty vagina
Thanks boo.
Trying to figure out why my back is hurting. And then I remember I got fucked up against a tree last night
Please don't think I'm weird for texting you this at 12:08 am but I just found another picture on the Internet where I think you can see his dick through whatever he's wearing
Randomize
