During sex he started singing that song in Forgetting Sarah Marshall--"Inside of You"--by Russell Brand
You don't need id to drink rum in an alley.
YOU GOT EVICTED FROM A TRAILER PARK!?!? WTF!!!!!
Life lesson #57: drinking whisky out of apples leads to threesomes.
she just threw a smoke bomb in an elevator and ran down 9 flights of stairs to see it at the bottom.
If that really is brett favre's penis, no wonder she ignored his calls
i mean, some people chug beer and some people chug hard liquor. some people have good ideas and some people have bad ideas. it's all about perspective.
Leaving your birthday party to engage in a threesome IS allowed. I checked the rule book.
Gas station champagne. And before you say anything I'll have you know it's imported. From California. So get fucked.
He put his name in my phone as David Hot Guy With Tattoos and I fell in love because that's what I was going to change his name to anyways
We need to leave a grand offering for the god of free booze and salvia.
I did wake up to a random meat and cheese plate next to my bed, that was a thrill.
I hate the cold months. Everybody starts hibernating and I start talking to guys I would never normally talk to. You have a drug habit and no license? Perfect candidate for a boyfriend...
My school has hired a professional rum bottle juggler for our dining hall this evening.
I'm so sorry for trying to eat your puzzle last night...
Randomize
