4:12a: just got back to his place now. I don't want to talk about it
i'm three days dirty after drinking 14 hours last night and some other questionable behavior (hula hooping at a large concert, for example) i will just always bring the class. and the sluttiness.
I just put a condom on my dildo so i wouldng get another uti....most depresIng moment of.my LIFE
I had one margarita and got the worst headache of my life... its like my liver has senior week ptsd
Just found a hole in my wall with your left shoe in it.
the boat had a sign not to jump off the roof of it, which gave us the idea to jump off the roof of it
just used my sex toy cleaning solution to clean my reading glasses. midterms are cramping my styleeee
Just made macaroni burritos. Fukkin awesome. We'll have to try this when I'm sober.,!
You made her yell her own name while you were fucking so that you would remember it in the morning.
Yeah started playing at the wedding last night, when the line. "Ludacris fills cups like DD" he starts pointing at my tits right in front of his grandparents.
I found her face down on the kitchen floor asking anybody who walked by for Kraft Dinner
I just set my acrylic nail on fire while trying to light my blunt
my extended weekend of being as irresponsible as possible started with blowing the bartender in the bar bathroom. off to a good start.
He and his ex stood there talking about going to get Chinese food while I was half naked searching for my panties
One sec I was having the time of my life, the next I was shitting water
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