he found my favorite bra, 3 thongs and a pair of jeans and gave them back. i love move out day.
Yep we found him face down in my sister's bathroom begging for blowjobs without mustard
coming from the girl bound and determined to pee in the snow
why would you restrict a girl of that
You ad-libbed two DETAILED rounds of price is right, 1 wheel of fortune, and 1 deal or no deal.... by yourself with sound effects and music included
she trying to cartwheel up the stairs... not going so well
she left with her roommate. or at least i think she did. but i also just thought i ate candy corn but i'm hal convinced it was candle wax.
I haven't gone out since the baby was born. If I don't get arrested, in a fight, or both I'm going to be super pissed.
he threw up in a solo cup, then washed it out and used it to play flip cup. Im not sure if thats resourceful or disgusting.
Being able to fart in her presence and not be judged is why I pay half the rent.
His girlfriend left him for the pizza guy. I am not fucking kidding.
Uhh I just had to break up with a guy who I didn't even know I was dating...
You told me you were trying to learn all the MLB ballparks while you waited for your porn to load.
Yea...Let's just say I gave her the best 3 and half minutes of her life then she took a 40 minute cab ride home that she paid for...
I hate closet cases. I've been wooing this chick the entire quarantine. We finally meet up tonight, we're two drinks in, I've got my hand half way up her skirt and her husband calls. She promised to bring home dinner.
Right. Cuz nothing screams "You made it!" quite like selling your used underwear to strangers you met on the internet.
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