I boned her and wore a Freddy mask once. It was pretty lol
Some chick in the back of my Psychologhy of Addictions class just did a line off her hand. She tried to make it look subtle.
You kept spitting the skittles out cause you said they tasted like "balls of sandpaper"
gross. I think i'll just donate all my eggs. My children will be incredible, but they're not welcome in my womb
good news. according to wikipedia, my blackout might just have been "post-trauma amnesia"
Oh and probably wearing a life jacket instead of clothes didn't help things either
halloween is the only time that anne boleyn, the joker, a cowgirl, and a mexican man complete with sombrero and poncho can all hit the same blunt
I just saw a herd of slutty loofahs run down the street...
BOOTY CALL IN EFFECT, BOOTY CALL IN PROCESS, BOOTY CALL ACCEPTED, AND BOOTY CALL INITIATES FRIDAY NIGHT.
I just threw up again because I opened my eyes... God is laughing. I resorted to taking the Mexican Dramamine because I feel seasick from walking. Not helping.
No more stories ab the wkend for co-workers... No one else found "and I didn't have pants on when I got home Saturday night" as funny as I did.
Some guy just ordered at Cosmo and 2 screwdrivers in the sky club at 8:30 am. I'm starting to feel a lot better about my alcoholism
He's all enlightened and liberal. My next beefcake will be much more Neanderthal.
Well shove his head down there and tell him not to stop til we have a new president!
There's lube and condom packets all over the street we missed something awesome.
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