it was like fucking with batman, he had gadgets i never even imagined
I don't think i can handle my uncle say again that kid rock is a true musician....
I think the guy in front of me just puked in a styrofoam cup.
We got a 5L jug of wine for 3 Euro. Italy was a good choice.
Bjs on a first date are the gateway to getting to know someone for who they really are.
I told you, we're just gonna get ripped and light sparklers
Grandma can hear your bong from the living room, please be more quiet. Love mom.
I just remembered something. Did we really all flash the cab driver to get half off?
I'm your Election Erection Connection
I retroactively revoke all sex we've ever had.
He asked her to marry him and she said yes. There is NO WAY she knows about his penchant for wearing lingerie.
Yeah even if I got stabbed it would be worth it
Let's be honest, I'm cooking chicken nuggets in my Helm jersey and underwear who has their life more together than me?
Dude you literally tried to cook your phone in the microwave. You were so wasted you asked your mom to help you turn it on.
I don't know what that means but it's making me want to fuck you.
We just started our own DARE program: Drugs are really enjoyable.
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