Yesterday I was informed there is a jewish dating website called jdate, I'm considering joining out of academic curiosity
I had his cock in my mouth and he still wouldn't shut up about Star Wars.
Remind me to tell you the one about the cashier that wouldn't sell me Jim Beam and NyQuil.
OMG HAIR ON HIS DICK. HAIR ON HIS DICK AS IN GROWING OUT OF HIS DICK. HAIR.
they're like a gay fantastic four
No it was after you showed us his fraternaty letters shaven out of your pubes
Hey. Hope youre not too hungover. Also, did you put a Christmas tree in my guest bathroom and cover it with condoms?
so do you, all the weight can't fall on me. I'll befriend a ball pit owner if you will befriend a drug dealer. teamwork.
She wouldn't put out on the first date. I think my boner put a hole in my mattress.
He told me the hickey on the side if his neck was actually a "bruise" from hitting a bird on his motorcycle. I'm not sure what's more impressive, the fact people believed him due to the size of the mark or the fact you gave it to him.
Who says no to sex and donuts?!
Can't find my wig, my underwear, or my dignity. Halloween 2016
I got a free corona t-shirt and all I had to do was drink a beer. This needs to be a more widely accepted form of currency.
I just asked Geoff what he is going to do because Hester left he said he was going to have gay sex with America.
Note to self: I can rip apart her vagina and she'll still cuddle with me, but if I steal her Chapstick she'll murder me !?
Randomize
