fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
I was about to watch some really classy porn. Title was ravenous for dick. I didnt know pornstars knew ravenous was a word.
So you actually don't remember giving head to the Neil Armstrong statue last night?
We were confused who drove until we went outside and her cupholders were torn out of the dash and laying on the ground
thanks. im glad you find me better in your comparison between me and fat girl porn.
Ps, did you know if you google "drunk jenga", you're the first image that shows up?
Say what you want, but those Fraggle Rock DVDs have gotten me laid twice.
So, I was thinking... Since this restraining order doesn't go into affect until monday, that leaves us 5 days to wreck his world.
She was puking in a plastic bag while cleaning where she puked on the floor. She knows how to multitask.
I may have just unintentionally roofied a man in a wheelchair
Hey so when you left last night was i wearing shoes?
We just had a 30 min argument on the actual birth date of Jesus, it ended in my brother and ain't cursing each other and an 8 yr old answering it by using Siri.
For dinner, I'm having saltines, canned whipped cream, and beer. Are we sure I'm responsible enough for home ownership?
It was a frighteningly large penis to say the least
If you find me in the bathroom in a fetal position, licking frozen bacon .. I might have Drank a little too much.
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