New rule: no balls on the kitchen counter.
so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
I wonder how many times I can be hungover in one day
Just tried to put my sweatpants on backwards...the chances of passing my physics exam just went down about 100%.
I waited so long to accept his friend request that he canceled it. So I added him and when he accepted I deleted him. I wonder how long this will be funny to me
My hanfda are one with the u niverse and I am cirretnly inhaling a couch
There's a point around the one and a half minute mark where the keg stand goes from impressive to pathetic
THAT IS NOT SOMETHING YOU TELL SOMEBODY THE FIRST TIME YOU MEET THEM IN THE DARK.
It is becoming increasingly more likely that my entire halloween costume will be entirely composed of borrowed clothing from the two girls I'm hooking up
If he survived pride he can survive a gay bar
People will call it the Wrath of the Froyo. We'll be immortalized.
Drinking and pointing where stuff needs to go is hard stuff.
Lol. I get my husbands paycheck every week. Immediate deposit into my purse next to his balls.
Dreamt I had my own personal vibrator rep, who made house calls. I earned an upgrade to an electric model, since I was burning through batteries. That's it. Time for a bf.
I have to stay away from bourbon. Despite what it keeps telling me, it is NOT my friend.
Randomize