I'm thinking of having one or both of my boobs out. They're small but they're mighty.
We just made watching Intervention into a drinking game. We drink everytime someone does drungs.
If there was a creeper hall of fame you and me would be the first two inductees
get home. someone threw up in the fishtank last night.
I just slapped my cat in the face with my dildo. You were the only one I could tell.
He probs deserved it.
Every good man does.
We found them in a dumpster making out trying to get their privacy
there's sperm and chicken noodle soup everywhere
Complete silence. Background Willy Wonka music. An empty back of Lay's BBQ chips. These are the ingredients for an extreme acid trip.
was it me or did you scream 'champagne motherfucker' when you punched him in the face ??
How many vodka infused gummi bears count as 1 drink?
OH HAPPY DAYS YOU'RE BOTH GINGERS YOU'LL REPRODUCE YOUR OWN KIND
I used the hope and guess method to figure out who I slept with last night.
If anybody had to puke on my shoes, I'm glad it was you.
I smoked a joint in the bathtub at 8 am then went back to bed
You talk the same way I hallucinate.
Randomize
