you traded sex for a burrito?
you were convinced that if all her tampons were gone her period would stop, so you started eating them.
at a bar and heard one girl tell another her tampon string was showing she goes i dont want it in anymore anyways. then proceeds to pull out her tampon in the middle of the bar and leave it on a plate. ewwww
You were hopping up and down because you wanted only his strongest sperms to make it to the egg.
Darwin at his finest.
Thanks in advance for a great weekend. Sorry your roommates are going to hate you after I leave. They need to loosen up anyways.
IM A DRUNK BIRTHDAY CLEOPATRA MESS. CELEBRATE THAT BITCH
You rope them in with the looks and the boobs, and I'll bore them into submission with random trivia. We can't lose.
doing the walk of shame back to your house in nothing but a bed sheet was definitely not one of my proudest moments..
Let's just say that in a last ditch effort to avoid getting arrested I said to the cop "but I'm not even that drunk" and he proceeded to point out (in front of a crowd) that I had "fucking pissed my pants"
So basically he is jobless, a potential serial killer, and has poor taste in music? We simply don't have time for that.
Trump won PA by a fucking landslide. If only Cruz hadn't eaten that booger.
This is why people in Buffalo die of heart attacks. This and wings
In honor of the new administration, I'm going to make it my goal this weekend to get some lesbian action. Fuck Donald Trump and fuck Mike Pence. I'm going to be a spiteful gay.
Gez, you make a couple noises and all of the sudden your the loud girl.
How’d it go?
I accidentally joined a cult
So not great...
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