i would totally switch to progressive if they'd let me bang that girl in the commercial.
Let me rephrase. Would it display my intentions too much if i walked all the way across my office and into the bathroom carrying my book
And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
I was hidding Easter eggs in CHURCH this morning when one of the older men came up to me and said "I always knew you'd be a bunny just not the Easter kind" ... Our congregation obviously has high hopes for their pastor's daighter
Hey. Be honored that I consider you the genital expert. I know alot of candidates for the position.
Yeah kinda weird. My grandparents are here for dinner and I'm chilling on the couch close to tripping out on pain killers. My pap asked me how works going and I prettymuch drooled on myself as an answer.
I feel as though sleeping all day due to the effects of prescription painkillers paid for by union insurance made this the most American day ever for me
Just got my stitches out.. Now I can give a proper hand job
You know it was a good night when you're lying on the couch in your pjs at 4pm having a pitcher of ice water for breakfast.
Nope. Too much basics going on right now. I'm tying you both up and throwing you to the vibrating sexy toy sharks. You shall either sink or get off gloriously.
I know it was a good night because I got a lecture from my roommates mom about stranger danger
you made me suck your tit in the car and kept saying "good boy. I love you so much. good boy."
its 3am and I'm taking a bubble bath, this is what taking a day off work at 30 looks like
like, you weren't just lying there, you were wrapped in what appeared to be the skin of a wolf, chanting doomsday prophecies
THE END IS NEIGH
He said when the pizza came I zip locked one slice and went to the couch and snuggled with it. Does that give you an idea of how my night was?
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