singing james blunt while drunk. tell me thats not wonderful
Who was more unwelcome: The two of us at the party last night, or Kimmy Gibler at the Tanner residence?
The plus side of allergy season is that after our weekend coke binge my runny nose fits right in.
And the cops told us we were all naked.
She spent a lot of time to get her cleavage to look that good. It would be rude not to stare. It shows you are paying attention. Chicks dig that.
That's like being smoked out by a unicorn. If the opportunity presents itself you fucking do it and don't ask questions.
there is a guy passed out on top of me and i don't know what to do. help if you're awake? was anyone anyone expecting someone? maybe he found the wrong room?
Topenga is going to be back on TV. Finally my fantasy of her being a milf in junior high has come full circle.
I own a halfway home for drunk girls, this is my life
I just had sex in the men's bathroom of a Chinese buffet...
YOU ARE MY HERO
That pizza at 1 am literally tasted like I was eating an angel
Sooo a reasonable response to someone eating my lunch is to set the place on fire right?
I just let my boss bend me over his desk and spank me. I think that is some sort of American dream.
Don't take a pillow from my bed. You don't know which ones of them my vagina has been on
Just sold our expired ticket for a free night of bowling to a drunk guy downtown for 50 bucks. Ill buy beer on my way home
Randomize
