id tell you what to do, but my morals dont exactly scream, "Listen to this guy!"
is it wrong that i plan on stealing a few pipecleaners from my preschool classroom to clean my bowl?
I'm destined to be knocked up by a sailor
Just saw a teacher from our school with his wife... Now i really know how little teachers get paid.
Just used my last prints at the library for brackets instead of final reviews. Hello March.
Dude I swear I heard "geet out!!!" when I went down on her. I shouldve listened.
there are some nice people on this island. free ride free pancakes and they even prayed for us when they dropped us off
Dear room mates I tried to shotgun pam in the kitchen. It is slippery. Please be careful. That is all. Love you.
Its official vodka lemonade jager and whiskey with coorslight is a bad combination of try to forget the work week cocktail ps bring alkaseltzer
Im officially canceling McCormick Monday. I got a raise.
Sooo grey goose Tuesday?????
And now I have fucked a local celebrity so double free drinks at bars.
This is home. And home is where you find your family. And you try not to make out with your family.
I got whiskey, so I think the blizzard and I are at an even match
I left my ice cream out over night, it's melted, fuck this, I just poured Bailey's in it. Problems solved.
Knew i was going to puke. So i grabed a bowl out of the kitcken in the dark before bed...Ended up puking into a spaghetti strainer...
Randomize
