Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
We always say that. And then its 4am and someone is screaming at strippers.
We made a bong out of a plastic football. I can honestly say we make a good team.
gay flight attendant. racoons. kegels. bartender with missing teeth. too many birthdays. fucckk.
I just entered us to win a trip to Vegas for spring break. GET YOUR VAGINA READY FOR THE ULTIMATE DICK HUNT!
I'm sorry for the texts and anything that I said that may have caused confusion, pain or irritation. I shall not be drinking again. Furthermore I will not be keeping a phone on me should I fail to adhere to the prior statement.
btw telling the cab driver, that took you to your booty call that is now returning your wallet that you left in his cab, that you want to hug him is awkward
So really what you're asking for is an allowance to not have sex on our futon.
Two chicks walked outta his room and all he did was beat his chest like LeBron and yell, "And 1!"
"She's seriously grinding on him while whispering into his ear, 'take me to McDonald's.'"
He met a girl at a stop light and managed to give her his number while driving down the highway.
He said that he had extra crunchy taquitos and wanted to go down on me.. I mean how could I say no?
Please tell me you did not shit your Disney princess costume.
HELL YEAH TIME TO KICK THE CHILDREN
Well I'm trying out this whole "not sleep with a stranger thing"
That's silly... just silly. And by silly I mean unrealistic.
Randomize
