guess who just spent driver's ed figuring out how to draw a guy giving head
True true and the only thing that will burn more than the vodka we will consume is the shame in our loved one's eyes
And yet we make it a tradition to get inappropriately drunk at family functions. We amaze me.
At least it's not a funeral this time... I feel we're making improvements.
Who were the five players on the alien team from space jam?
Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
I think I just sat on my labia. Can I borrow some scotch tape?
We told the pizza man that the door was most likely unlocked, he could leave the pizza on the counter and give himself 20%. He did it-I'm never moving out of Aspen.
She was like the Rudy of blow jobs... SO much effort into it
Ok but if you die you have to get "I should've listened to Mike" carved into your tombstone
they drunkenly created an obstacle course for the poor hamster and its ball.
So he says "my girlfriends coming over so you have to leave but I love you"
Your mom won me $100 and you showed me your tits. Solid evening.
And then we will celebrate by drinking and making fun of him. As per usual.
Below this exterior of ice is a layer of cum. Followed by a pool of gin. More cum. Then, finally a heart.
You can't give me tequila around boys who have girlfriends. That ain't new.
The sex definitely would have been a perk. But not sitting in a ditch was what I was going for...
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