We should be called the Road Head Warriors
homeboy just tried to sext with me at 8:30 in the morning while I was on a job interview...
so you did it...
obv...but still...it was inconsiderate.
I think she's a little more wasted than usual. She just crawled on the floor to tell mom it was time to take a shot.
So I just bought underwear that says "I'm taken." Just know that when I cheat on my bf with you, that's what I'm wearing
"lets watch the sunrise" turned into "lets have sex on the roof at six thirty in the morning"
There's a wake for a coworker on 420 during te time of 420... Hoping everyone will be too sad to notice how high I am.
Only thing worse than going to work with a hangover is going to work with a hangover then realizing that u don't have to work that day
One day this summer I just wanna get blown under the hot sun all day.
Deal. Roof-top 69 on Saturday, July 20th. I've got it in my calendar.
So I found out me and this guy I was drinking beer with tonight both got lactated on by the same stripper. We're milk brothers.
nana can keg stand better than me. should i be proud?
Nothing says "forever alone" like receiving a friendship bracelet from your parents.
If your night didn't end with writing a witness report for the cops at a shwarma place, your night was probably less interesting than mine.
Is 28 too old to get fingered in Centennial Park? Asking for a friend.
what a classic moment of my life. A buffet of taco bell and a taser gun.
Idk, I know when I drink vodka my bi side comes out and I just want to make out with a girl
Randomize
