There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
It was like doing yoga with his dick in me
I just told a dude I hooked up with last night he was the pick of the litter.
I introduced him to the male G-Spot. Don't ever tell me I'm not experienced.
i've met an abundance of virgins and guys who where flip flops, i thinks there's a correlation
Ignoring the crisis im in. Sitting in the front yard in a kiddie pool. Wearing arm floaties, fins and a snorkel. Waiting for a hot guy to walk by.
it felt like i was a kid in an empty playground. i fucked him on every piece of furniture in the house and then when his housemates showed up i was naked in his bed like i'd been there all along.
My dick can't jump between your dick and her mouth, man. It's impossible, I think.
Let's get weird.
It's 10 am...
I'm assuming that means you're not busy...
How will you ever teach your dogs to pee outside when the biggest puddle on your bedroom carpet is from you?
I can only get day drunk because of my medicine now, so... There's that
Do you think I can get away with quoting Work Bitch by Britney Spears in my speech?
Don't trim your pubes if you've been drinking. I can't believe I have to tell you more than once.
So I woke and tried to get up. Then I realised my foot was stuck in the pocket of the pool table.
Awake! can you bring me my pants...im under the couch
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