VAGINAS EVERYWHERE
they're staring at me
i keep myself tagged when other girls look bad/ugly so i look better
you hid your keys in a box of lucky charms because drunk you was apparently going to eat them for breakfast...
she broke up with me and one of her excuses was constant soreness... should I be sad or proud?
Believe it or not I'm actually not the only person sitting in the back of the train covered in glitter and drinking whiskey out of an arizona iced tea can. Small world.
Lets ignore the fact that you want to turn your dorm room into a sex dungeon and focus on the real issues here.
also I woke up naked and covered in water but nobody can explain that part.
We got out of the car in valet drinking beers we gave the valet one as a tip
Dude, im sorry I had sex with that girl I was trying to hook you up with last night. Good news though she puts out
It's called hot rabbit the party if he asks the password is "careful" don't ask
Is it weird that sometimes I like to have sex for the health benefits and workout more than the pleasure
Wait. How did I get engaged last night?
I just ran into my psychology professor at Planned Parenthood she asked why I was there and I asked why she was there and it turns out we both had a scare.#bonding because of abortion.
all i remember is walking home without my pants on... when i woke up i was sleeping in between my parents in their bed, no more whiskey wednesdays
He sided with his father, so I slashed his tires. I’d say that’s a fair trade.
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