honey bunches of taint.
I remember spending $50 at Ozzie's on Friday...my Visa remembers $120.
He sat on a barstool and did the robot for 3 hours - I'm pretty sure he enjoyed himself.
I don't think a check that has "thx for the drugs" on the note is really gonna fly.
I justified spending $400 stocking my bar to my sister by saying it was an investment
Personally I think it's a tremendous investment
She tried to escape and she fell and hit the door. She's gunna freak when she wakes up with only half a tooth.
We're gonna take a moment of silence to pray... that his penis is as pretty and as talented as his brothers.
FYI, your girlfriend is on her way to the ER. She tried to balance a bottle of jack on her chest. Smashed toes, blood all over patio. Call her, kinda funny though.
let's just say if he has a penis and he hypothetically needs to put it somewhere... i would take care of that for him.
she asked him to cuddle cuz she was cold and instead he got up, moved the space heater to her side of the bed, and went back to sleep
How did "just two beers for happy hour" turn into naked backyard wrestling?
He's getting off drug court. We're doing a super-blunt with 50 dollars worth stuffed inside. He almost cried tears of joy when we told him.
no joke- she just sprinkled parmesan cheese into her champagne and slurred "I just need a little snack"
He said I gave him the best head he's ever had and I bowed. I BOWED.
I wish my nipples were as well behaved as yours.
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