WTF why am I in the Atlanta airport?
we just decided that lesbian tuesdays are a must, as of tomorrow.
Let's roleplay tonight. I'll be drunken diva and you be sexy sober.
IF that's your way of making me dd then count me out.
So when I got her home I realized being a lesbian again isn't like riding a bike...
You poured your drink on yourself and then said "it's not a party until I'm wet"
Carpeing THE FUCK out of that diem
IM A SHIT SUOW THE GUYS AT THE PMACR TOLD ME AJDBO I WEBF RO WALNARY WITH OU SHOES! I WASHT LLOWES FLOWERSA
I'm two sheets to the sexual wind
I stood on the corner waiting to be picked up, dry heaving, and trying to block out the sun.
I partied with a deaf mute last night. strangely enough the more drunk I get the easier it is to understand him.
I've made this amazing blanket/pillow cocoon combo and I am set for life in here.
you asked me how to turn on the ladder
i found you passed out on the floor with a half-eaten pie. i figured youd be the last person to care if i went and banged your sister
So. Much. Porn.
I think my roomie is silently judging me for spraining my foot by having sex in a bounce house
so the bounce house and tequila was good idea then?
Randomize
