4:25 am: I want you here. Ugh.
member when we used to take shits together before volleyball games?
pretty sure I just motor boated my professor at the drag show
I was so high I couldnt even listen to music i was terrified of the potential knowledge i would gain.
On the airplane today the pilot actually said "Ladies and gentlemen I'm sorry for the delay. But I know all of you have problems, and so do we..."
there may or may not be knives in your bed. I would check
It felt like getting blasted with a supersoaker filled with vagina juice.
The usual, im laying out. Ipod on shuffle, Large spray bottle to cool myself of and a smaller one filled with chilled vodka. I can spray the vodka right in my mouth without even opening my eyes. THIS IS LIVING....
I almost lit my balls on fire tonight.
He has a lot of emotional energy invested in your vagina.
I'm like a number 27.2 on a scale of 1-10 of how badly I want you right now.
Your lack of a response brings it down to a 25.4.
I'll ask around, all of my friends have girlfriends now for the most part though so they're all dead inside
So the door man at the local dispensary started giving me motivational talks about my beard...
someone is getting fuckign RAWDOGGED on this campus as we speak and it makes me FURIOUS
I think she lost me at about the point where the words “Ice Cream Enema” were spoken.
Randomize
