Where are I am going home with Ryan
I don't know who this or Ryan is but it is probably too late to talk you out of it
How do you feel about the band name "O'labia Newton John"??
Can you believe The 5th Element didn't get best fight scene in 1997?! I'm still bitter. 12 years later.
Haha how do you remember that?
HOW COULD I FORGET?!
She bet her virginity on the Celtics. Looks like Kobe wont be the only one breaking in a new ring.
Trying to guess which perfume the stripper was wearing based on my bf's clothes
Maybe not, but you have to admit watching him get hit by the car was gratifying
He literally sends me dick pictures, EVERY DAY. SEVERAL DIFFERENT ANGLES ..it's like I GET THE POINT.
Wtf just happened. Thought you were in my bed since 3am, turned out I was sharing it w/a drunk girl from the 6th floor lounge...
So apparently using the emergency exit of the bar as a bathroom is frowned upon in this establishment...
I'm high and reading a Wikipedia article on circumcision procedure. Help.
apparently I like to do this thing where I wear pretty dresses and then pee on things on public. Picture proof. Four times last week.
but seriously, an anthropology paper shouldn't be hard if you're trashed, right?
I took multi-tasking to a new level. I just ate a plate of nachos off my lap while driving to the bar. And I barely got any on me.
Would you like to get a drink then hook up or reverse order I don't really care. Hopefully you can keep this between us.
He in a way got kinda cockblocked by Jesus
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